Schizophrenia

You said of  spirit-experience: ‘Our experience in the spiritual dimension is to increase our energy by merging’ , are there challenges involved in this exercise?

Spirit does not experience ‘challenge’ as you do. There is no courage or daring required. It may sound dull to you, but as energy is the whole nature of spirit, action is also its nature, and all experience contributes. There is simply no resistance. Perhaps you’d understand better if you remember I told you how positive the experience is when you return to the spirit dimension.

Astrologically we are entering a very challenging period of time requiring specific hard work around the weakest areas of our personalities. It seems as if it will endure till next spring – is this correct? There is no way round this, is there?

I’m surprised you ask if this difficult period can be avoided. No, it is as certain as any prognostication can be. You have strength and help to guide you. It is appropriate to see this as ‘challenging’ but use all the methods at your disposal to keep centred and focused on your efforts. BUT, don’t forget the need for relaxation at regular intervals – otherwise tension will negate your work.

Can you explain something about Marc’s schizophrenia for us? Is this an illness he chose to experience during this life?

To choose the experience of schizophrenia is one of the most difficult earthly paths, much harder than bodily debilities. In spirit he recognised it would add greatly to his knowledge and strength (spiritual growth). He was ready to undertake such a journey.

What are the required conditions for schizophrenia to manifest? Are there irreconcilable divisions deep within his subconscious?

There must be divisive tensions in the primary relationships. The split exists from early childhood even though not clearly manifesting until adolescent changes as he struggles furiously to become one or the other of his potential personalities. This is then exaggerated by the environment he experiences. Psychically this is deeply buried and it is not fully reconcilable. He will always be at odds with himself living outside the range of the usually accepted understanding of reality.

Is there a specific spiritual presence during his ‘altered states’?

His personal guide is there, often with others, particularly when he is losing his own direction completely. He needs a great deal of support to survive the titanic struggles of his mind.

When one has great darkness within, is it possible for it to become a reality?

Once I described a scale of darkness and light in everyone. When you are weakened in mind, spirit or even body, you fall prey to influence at the dark end of the scale. Throughout your life you create reality (your perception of what is) from this scale. When the darkness is great it may utterly overcome your attraction out of it towards light. You will then regard it as ‘reality’ but you can turn. It may require much spiritual help to increase your energy to that point. It is always available.

Is he helping himself as much as he can? Can anyone else help him in any way?

At this point, yes. It is a never-ending battle. He does get help from others, but he will keep them at a distance, including using drugs for this purpose. The medication which does aid his ability to balance his conscious use of mind with blanking out all mental sensation keeps him just able to manage his life at the current level. He will strongly resist any attempt to change what he is doing in the name of help. Accepting him as he is helps most as the meeting with Marc and Sue definitely did. A little increase in self-esteem assists him to help himself.

What causes Gill to move so quickly between love and hate? Where does it come from?

Gill has always found responses to her good efforts of every kind unequal to her expectations. She is now at a stage comparable to adolescence where the body’s systems which are responsible for outward expression of emotion are changing from moment to moment. The two great motivators of love and hate stem from the same sources of satisfaction and dissatisfaction, but are currently amplified by these hormonal shifts of speed and intensity.

How can she feel repelled by her environment one day and supported by it the next? How can she find and retain whatever true centre she has?

These undulating changes in Gill, not the environment, are a lot dependent on her physical condition. I’ve been calling this to your attention for some time. It is too easy to react to the outside world to account for the discomforts of the internal environment. She needs to call on God’s presence everywhere to help her appreciate what will support her every day. She suggests a mantra for you to use with your worry stone. It would help for her to have one to turn her back to the centre which is divine care. That faith can carry you both through this hard time. It will pass.

What is happening to her ‘cycles’ now which have become more irregular and intense? Can she measure and predict them astrologically?

This is a normal physical development which Gill feels more than most. The cycles are not predictable as they depend on such a constellation of glandular functions operating independently.

Where and how do feelings begin and how do they develop?

Conscious thought rests on language structures, but feelings exist free of that specificity as a quality of being. Feelings are a manifestation of pure energy in a particular form. They are roused from a volume of accumulated reactions to the personal world around you from birth. Before words, you know physically and psychically sensations of warmth, chill, hunger, safety, pain, comfort etc. From this basic vocabulary your feeling patterns developed. You may by nature, example and training express or suppress them, but they will precede and colour your responses. Repeated experience of a harmful or helpful nature will reinforce early feelings, but not alter them deeply. Even so, new experience adds stimuli which will modify behaviour and the intensity of feelings.

Why can’t Gill find the will to be more active? Is it long-term depression? Is it clinical?

She has lost faith that life is meaningful and her own lack of belief makes it nearly impossible to care enough to will action. But she cannot close out the vitality of her own being. Her depression is of long duration and consumes much energy. Is it clinical? She is asking where help is. The source of the psyche’s strength is within each individual, the invisible fabric of the person’s existence. Gill is a portion of All That Is – therefore the universe leans in her direction. No-one is ignored, forgotten or lost. Asking will lead to that greater source of being. If she feels clinical help is appropriate, seek it, but don’t forget the ultimate source is within.

Why is it that Gill has to ask all my questions for me and I can’t?

You feel a measure of safety keeping any questions on matters of depth in a private place. You don’t often articulate them even to me in the silence of prayer or – the same thing really – to yourself. If my responses were what you expect, you really would give up on yourself. You have forgiven yourself for some perceived faults, but the sense of unworthiness has been so great, you haven’t been equal to examining all. You actually “believe” in the love and care of the Creator, but do not actually feel in your gut that He is always with you. You can’t deeply believe that you, warts and all, are worth saving “saving” or better, are “saved” – at least potentially a “good” person. So you don’t want to ask.

Am I as depressed as Gill? And for as long a period?

There is no point in comparing your feelings with Gill’s. Much of your life you have been unhappy, despairing and afraid, but always seeking relief whenever you could find it. Even with that as an undertone you learned that everyday there is some beauty, some kindness, a few laughs, a cartwheel – always something to be grateful for. Counting your blessings when you were able has seen you through these bad times. When all else fails, always some experience with music succeeds and is waiting. Until you accept yourself, you’ll keep on hurting. You’ll only find relief in the conviction you are ‘saved’, namely a part of All That Is.

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